Sunday, July 24, 2011

Life goes on

At Hannah's dad funeral her aunt who's daughter died in a car wreck just a few weeks ago was there. Its been a hard summer for this family. I hugged her and murmured a few words of condolence mostly just gave her a look that said more.

After the funeral dinner this aunt had to get going because one of her other kids had something they had to do.
We spoke for a few minutes about how they almost had not had a birthday party for their surviving daughter because the aunts brother had just died when she realized that he would not have wanted that at all. I whispered to her that life goes on and she agreed.

When you are grieving you lose track of time and it seems unreal that yours is the only life that seems to have stood still. Life is still going on around you.

I realized last night that one of the reasons I feel that I don't know what to do to comfort my daughter is that when my husband Charlie died 16 years ago I was so wrapped up in my own grief that I really left the older girls to deal with it on their own. I am sorry for that. This time I am grieving but its more for Hannah and that side of the family than it is for myself and I don't know what to do for her.


Humble wife said...

We all deal with death in differing ways. Saying nothing does not mean you have not shown through actions etc.

I am as odd, because I become pragmatic about the death and go forth.

Since everyone ends up dying we both can rest assured that our emotions are quite normal.

Yolanda said...

Don't beat yourself up, Debbie. Life is hard enough.

Kaleena Kay said...

Mom, Just remember that our Ultimate Comforter is Jesus Christ. Just remind Hannah that she still has her Heavenly Father and to lean on him in this time of loss. When my step-dad I didn't have my Heavenly Father yet and it wasn't until I turned to Him and really let Him be in control, that I could heal. I love you and I love Hannah.